Worthless Apologies

Whoa, WordPress is all… Different looking. WEIRD.

Anyway, uh, what the hell was I gonna say?

Sunday is Rainbow’s birthday party. It might be kinda weird because the other day, she asked me to help her with her art history paper and it was due the next day. I don’t really like having little time to help someone with their homework because then it eats up a lot of my own time that I might have needed for my own personal needs, but whatever. I agreed to help her. But that day, I was really tired that I didn’t go on the internet to read my email and I just did my homework and went to bed. The next day, she calls me and tells me that it’s due right then and there. I felt bad that I totally forgot and I offered to help her with it during that time and maybe she can turn it in later that day. So I went to the Media Center to get what I thought was going to be the rough draft of her paper. When I read the email, there’s only a picture attachment of the painting she’s critiquing and a rushed message saying, “Thanks a lot for helping me out with a very last minute……It has to be a page long
I really appreciate your help”. Just from reading this, it was obvious that she was expecting me to write the actual paper itself. This immediately pissed me off and I texted her, asking if she hadn’t written anything for the paper. Then she came to the Media Center and I straight up said, “I’m sorry, but I’m not writing your paper for you.” She said that she wasn’t intending to ask me to write her paper and I’m misinterpreting what she’s trying to say and showed me a bunch of her previous assignments to “help me see what she’s trying to write”. Then she proceeded to tell me that she was expecting to see my email in the morning, but it wasn’t there and she got to school and the assignment still wasn’t done because things happen and that’s life. But she had to go do a presentation in art history, so she quickly left. I just kinda sat there for a good two minutes, completely baffled. Then I looked at her previous assignments and that doesn’t fucking help because they are for past assignments. She still didn’t even make a rough draft and she didn’t have any outline for this assignment. If she really didn’t intend for me to write the paper, why didn’t she at least write out some contents? Why didn’t she call me to ask if I could help with brainstorming? Why didn’t she call me to make sure I remembered to help her out? I mean, it’s not my assignment. I am not responsible for it. From what she said, it almost seemed like she was partly trying to make it my fault that this happened.

Well, since I was left with no choice, I wrote the paper for her. She came back later on and thanked me for saving her ass and that she’s sorry that I ended up writing it. I was just really annoyed, so I gave her one word answers and told her to go before she gets in trouble with her teacher.

During this time period, I couldn’t do my Statistics homework and I didn’t get to eat my lunch. But as she said, things happen and that’s life, right? Yeah, whatever.

Then later on, I was drawing Mt. Tam for art class and I sat outside by the cafeteria. Then Chi and Rainbow came by and Chi said that she’s the mediator and tried to “explain the situation”. What? I don’t need a translator or interpretor, I know exactly what happened. Chi wasn’t involved, it was me and Rainbow, why is she getting into it? Well, Rainbow thought that I was misunderstanding her intentions and didn’t want me to think that she’s just the kind of person who wants people to do her work for her. No, I’m not misunderstanding anything. Sure, her intention may not have been for me to write her paper. But what was the result? I DID END UP WRITING IT FOR HER. If Rainbow was that concerned about what happened, why didn’t she come up to me and tell me herself? Why does Chi need to tell me? I don’t need to hear it from Chi. I just really felt even more shocked by this. I didn’t want to bother with it anymore because I was drawing, so I just said whatever and pretended that I was all cool with it.

The truth is, I’m still annoyed that it happened. I mean, it happened and there’s nothing I can do about it. But just the way it was handled was so immature and unnecessary. There isn’t a misunderstanding. I know perfectly well what happened because I was actually part of the situation. If there would be any misunderstanding, it would be anyone who didn’t have anything to do with it making judgments on it.

It just pisses me off that I barely ever ask for anyone to help me and then people do shit like this. If it were me, I’d rather not do the assignment at all than to ask someone to do it for me. Call it having too much pride or whatever you want. But it’s true. Why should my responsibilities be someone else’s?

ANYWAY. It’s over with.

And now, I’ll go to bed.